I should have planned better for my future.
Gone to college.
Dated different guys.
Experienced being self-sufficient.
Not gotten married so young.
Worked to make more money.
Waited to have children.
Spaced my children.
Stopped having children.
And many more things. At least this is what I'm told. Often. If not in blunt words, in furrowed brows or quizzical looks. It's not always easy to feel like such an odd person. Sometimes it seems like it would be easier to have done what I was "supposed" to do.
But then again, if I had......
I wouldn't have been woken up this morning by my six year old who was ready to read her Bible and drink tea with me.
I wouldn't be able to kiss my husband knowing he's the only man I've ever kissed, held hands with or loved.
I wouldn't have laughter and total fulfillment. every. single. day.
I wouldn't have the total joy of watching my five beautiful daughters completely delighting in each other and totally adoring and being adored by their incredible daddy.
I wouldn't have been here with my four year old yesterday as she came to me with joy and said, "I'm ready to ask Jesus into my heart!".